Now What Caring for a parent with dementia at home: organizing the first months
Short answer: build a predictable routine, make the home safer, and get the information organized: medications, appointments, contacts and documents in one place the whole family uses. The National Institute on Aging suggests keeping daily tasks at the same times, letting your parent do as much as they can, removing trip hazards, and getting help so you don't burn out. The Alzheimer's Association 24/7 Helpline (800.272.3900) can point you to local support.
Caring for a parent with dementia at home is a marathon that often starts as a sprint. The first months are when routines, safety changes and family roles get set, and when good organizing saves the most stress later.
Care tips on this page come from the National Institute on Aging (NIA) at alzheimers.gov. This page isn't medical advice: questions about symptoms, medications or safety belong with your parent's doctor. In an emergency, call 911.
Build a routine (NIA tips)
- Keep a routine, such as bathing, dressing and eating at the same time each day.
- Help your parent write down to-do lists, appointments and events in a notebook or calendar.
- Plan activities they enjoy, and try to do them at the same time each day.
- Consider a system or reminders for medications taken regularly. Ask the pharmacist which system fits their medications.
- Let them do as much as possible when dressing or bathing, and tell them step by step what you're going to do.
- Serve meals in a consistent, familiar place and give them enough time to eat.
Make the home safer (NIA tips)
- Stairs: at least one handrail, and carpet, grip strips or brightly colored tape on step edges.
- Remove trip hazards: small rugs, electrical cords and unused items.
- Good lighting in every room and outdoor area they use.
- Safety plugs in unused outlets, and safety latches on cabinets.
- Lock up or remove cleaning and household products, such as paint thinner and matches.
- Remove curtains and rugs with busy patterns that may confuse them.
- A sturdy shower chair for someone who is unsteady.
Get the information organized
- One current medication list, copied exactly from the labels, shared with everyone who helps. The free binder below includes one.
- A care contacts page with every doctor, the pharmacy and family members.
- An appointments log with what the doctor said, so the next person to go knows the history.
- A daily checklist so several helpers can see what's been done. See the daily caregiver checklist.
- Permission to talk to their doctor or lawyer. The NIA suggests getting permission in advance, because without consent you may not be able to get needed information about care, bills or insurance claims.
Share the work, and look after yourself
The NIA notes that caring for someone with dementia is often many people's job, and suggests asking family, friends and local services for help, joining a caregiver support group, taking breaks every day, and talking with your doctor if stress or anxiety is building. Write down who does what so nobody is guessing. For more, see what to do when caregiving takes over and how to talk to a parent with dementia.
Where to get help
- Alzheimer's Association 24/7 Helpline: 800.272.3900, free, any time.
- NIA's ADEAR Center: 800-438-4380 or adear@nia.nih.gov.
- Local services, including respite care and support groups: your Area Agency on Aging, through eldercare.acl.gov or 1-800-677-1116.
Common questions
How do you care for a parent with dementia at home?
Build a predictable daily routine, make the home safer, and keep medications, appointments, contacts and documents organized in one place the family shares. The National Institute on Aging suggests doing daily tasks at the same times, letting the person do as much as possible, removing trip hazards, and asking for help so the caregiver does not burn out.
How can I make my home safer for a parent with dementia?
The National Institute on Aging suggests at least one handrail on stairs, marking step edges, removing small rugs and cords, good lighting, safety plugs and cabinet latches, locking up cleaning and household products, removing busy-patterned rugs and curtains, and a sturdy shower chair for someone who is unsteady.
What should I organize first when a parent with dementia lives at home?
A current medication list copied from the labels, a care contacts page, an appointments log, and a daily checklist so several helpers can see what has been done. The National Institute on Aging also suggests getting permission in advance to talk to their doctor or lawyer.
Where can I get help caring for a parent with dementia at home?
The Alzheimer's Association 24/7 Helpline at 800.272.3900, the National Institute on Aging's ADEAR Center at 800-438-4380, and your local Area Agency on Aging, which you can find through the Eldercare Locator at eldercare.acl.gov or 1-800-677-1116.
How do I avoid burnout caring for a parent with dementia?
The National Institute on Aging suggests asking family, friends and local services for help, joining a caregiver support group, taking breaks each day, keeping up with friends and hobbies, and talking with your doctor about stress or anxiety.